See, I was looking forward to this game. I like pinball, and I'm fairly certain that I have played this series on the PC or somewhere else and liked it. And video game pinball is usually okay if not great.
And so I started up the game on my PSP, heart full of child-like joy and other lovely feelings I can't be bothered to describe accurately. "Let's get some low-res pinball on!" I said to no one in particular. "Okay!" I replied to myself internally, praising myself as well for not shouting all my thoughts out loud while riding the bus like I usually do.
Okay, loading...some cute music...
Oh, good, I like Sierra games usually. Yeah, this is a good sign.
Um, okay, that's an unusual logo but these avant-garde developers will do anything to make you remember their games. Maybe this is a good sign and I'm about to play some artsy, meaningful pinball.
Okay yeah this is not gonna happen, is it? I mean, the music is playing fine and everything but this is looking increasingly bad.
By the time the title screen comes up (the first screen shot above) I realize that something might be wrong. Maybe. So I try another emulator to see if that works. Then another. And another. And I get a different copy of the game and try that in all four emulators as well. Every time I get exactly the same results. How could this have slipped by the developers of four different emulators? I have no idea, but clearly this game is not in my future.
|Ah yes, of course.|
|-look like a nightmare.|
Ah well, that's okay. I'll just show you my photo album instead of playing a real game.
Alright that's all today. Maybe tomorrow's game will actually work! Maybe!
|Day 3: Objects have lost all meaning, the ball relentlessly falls towards my flippers. |
I keep it afloat but I know not why. I am no longer myself. If you find this journal,
burn it for the sake of yourself and for humanity. I...can't...I AM....PINBALL....