But I can do what nobody else is willing to do: play a game about a block-pushing potato like it's 1991.
They should have sent a poet.
In any case, thanks again to the A-Mazing dash, we get another game that really should be closer to the middle of the list. That's okay! I'm glad I played this game now, because gosh I did not know what I was missing.
Let's be clear, though: I wasn't missing anything of importance.
My first impression of this game is that potatoes look a lot like eggs when the sprite is very small. I like the idea of dancing vegetables though, and I'm excited to find out just what kind of A-mazing A-dventures I'll be having as a potato.
|Hello Mato, I'm Uman Human.|
I hate Sokoban. This may not surprise you as I clearly hate everything but there's a special place in the burnt out shell of meat I call my heart for Sokoban. Mostly it's because I'm really, really bad at it. Anything but the most basic of puzzles causes my brain to try and escape my skull through any means possible. So it's not really the game's fault, it's my skull-shattering stupidity. But I still hate Sokoban.
|THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE oh no wait this is easy|
|Really long blocks!|
I find myself actually enjoying the game, which is pretty amazing. Some of the puzzles are a bit devious and require some lateral thinking. Others seem impossible at first glance but, once the solution clicks, I solve them easily. I think my favorite is this one:
|Ahh, yes, of course, Tetris Hell|
And then this level happened:
Except it's NOT that easy because there's a freaking hidden hole under the rotating door that I can't see. And since I don't know it's there, I ruin the level and have to start all over again.
So I quit! Just like a good, spoiled, modern gamer.
I don't really have a conclusion for this. If this game was a book, it would be Sudoku for People who Hate Themselves. If it was a movie, it would be realllly boring. And if it was a video game, it wouldn't be any better.
No, I don't know what that last sentence means either.
On the next episode of No Batteries, we'll be venturing back into the land of squiggly lines that Clint Can't Read to watch overweight men lose their tempers. Just like in my dreams.